Anonymous Athlete Advice [Series]
The recruiting process is an exciting time filled with all kinds of new possibilities for the next chapter of your life. But it can also be overwhelming and hard to navigate. Even though you will have advice coming at you from every direction, many people don’t actually understand what it’s like to be in that position. However, there’s a large group of people who do: college basketball players. They have been in your shoes. They have made good decisions and bad decisions. And they have a lot of firsthand experience, knowledge, and wisdom to pass along.
We are now introducing the Anonymous Athlete Advice Series. We will be interviewing current and former college basketball players to gather their best advice on navigating the recruiting process and all things related to college basketball. Our hope is that through their successes and failures, wise decisions and mistakes, they can help you make the best possible decision for your own life and basketball career.
“If I can impress upon you one thing, it’s to stop trying to impress them..”
I remember being so concerned with other people’s opinions about my decision. I wanted to impress my friends, teachers, random people I talked to on the street about playing basketball in college… I wanted my choice of college to sound impressive. And now I realize their opinions meant nothing, and I wish I would not have let them have any bearing on where I was going to spend the next four years of my life.
That is probably one of the biggest things for me. I wish I would have known that you are the one that has to go there. No one else's opinions matter because you are the one that has to go play there and go to school there. You have to spend the next 4-5 years of your life there. It’s cool to tell people a cool big name school that garners a reaction, but at the end of the day, it’s your life. So don’t make a decision based on the opinions of those around you.”
- Current Female College Basketball Player
I wanted my choice of college to sound impressive. And now I realize their opinions meant nothing, and I wish I would not have let them have any bearing on where I was going to spend the next four years of my life.
Maybe this seems obvious. But this was something I struggled with throughout my recruiting process. When you are getting recruited, a lot of people will share unsolicited opinions on your decision. It is easy to allow the desire to impress people to seep into your decision-making process, even subconsciously. I actually had two separate people tell me (to my face) that they were disappointed after I announced where I was going.
The school I picked wasn’t big enough or well-known enough for them. Even though I knew they shouldn’t, deep down, these comments hurt because I cared too much what they thought. The prideful part of me still wanted to impress them. But it forced me to take a step back and reevaluate who and what should have the power to influence my decision. And it sure wasn’t these two people.
Frankly, all they cared about was knowing someone who played at a big school. They sat at home and (maybe) watched. They weren’t the ones who would actually attend that school and play basketball there… I was. (I want to be sure to clarify: going to a big-time school is absolutely awesome. I am cautioning against making a decision largely based on impressing other people).
Where you decide to go to school becomes the actual reality of your life, and no one else’s. Once you step foot on campus, playing a college sport is no longer just an idea. You have to put in the work, you have to grind, you have to put in the time. It’s no longer just a cool fact you get to tout in your social media bio. It's living the highs and lows of college basketball.
It’s getting up early in the morning for practice and weight lifting and conditioning. It’s going to class and getting a degree. It’s getting involved and building relationships. You have to decide where you want to invest yourself. And the level of happiness that comes from being at a place where you can thrive lasts infinitely longer than that little rush of pleasure you get from impressing people when you tell them your decision.
So here is my advice: don’t base your decision on trying to impress anyone. Because the people you think you need to impress will stop caring the second you walk out the door.
- AAA